This year I participated in the Kindness Challenge, which Niki Meadows hosted this year for the second time. I still follow her regularly and today I came across an article by her, I believe the perfect follow-up for the article I published yesterday: Embrace all of you.
There is a difference between being authentic, embracing your positives plus limitations (and those of others), and being brutally honest.
Niki explained it fantastic:
Are you confusing authenticity with brutal honesty? Don’t worry, you aren’t alone if you are. For many years I thought that being brutally honest was speaking my authentic truth. In reality, it was just that, brutal honesty. It wasn’t until I learned how to connect with myself on a deeper level that I was able to discover my authentic voice. You see, authenticity stems from a place of self-acceptance and self-love. So in order to speak your authentic truth, you have to nurture the relationship with yourself.
Your authentic voice comes from a place of truth and love. Now that doesn’t mean that everything you express is rainbows and butterflies but it does mean that it’s not just what you say but how and when you say it. For example, a difference of opinion can be expressed in a way that is true to your heart but seeks to understand and accept the truth of the other person, even if it’s not your own. Another way of using your authentic voice is by sharing constructive feedback instead of giving criticism that comes from a place of judgment. Constructive feedback is intended to support and uplift someone. Criticism generally tears them down without regard to how it makes them feel whether it’s supportive or not. I’m not saying to go around sugar-coating everything but I’ve found that my authentic voice is more tender, caring, and empowering. The reason is, it’s coming from my heart so it’s only natural that it reflects what’s there. Once you’ve connected with your authentic voice, it’s a matter of choosing to use it. The more you develop the relationship with yourself through self-love and self-acceptance, the easier it is to extend the same to others.
Here are a few ways to help you determine if you’re speaking your authentic truth or you’re being brutally honest:
I hope this has helped you identify where your truth is coming from. If you aren’t speaking with your authentic voice, the good news is recognition is the first step towards change! Now that you’re aware of it, you can practice using your authentic voice. You’ll have many opportunities throughout each day so be patient with yourself. You might find yourself realizing it after the fact, that’s normal at first. Set the intention to speak from your heart and it will help you connect with your authentic voice.
Sending lots of love your way and wishing you all that you need to support you in speaking your authentic truth!